dream I was trying to rescue a child and thought the child was me. kept thinking I’m going into the darkside. my dark side. there was also me confronting a woman rapist who had raped a child. I was crying and telling her I got raped. 

time moves slowly. I have almost no motivation to leave my bed. I am amazed that I am combing my hair. if I do, it is a cause for applause. mostly I am wearing the same black pants and some sweater and the same gray hat. I have not worn makeup in weeks. almost nothing gets done except basic hydration and that is questionable given my like for coffee. I don’t remember eating and hours go by. I usually have a handful of almonds. maybe a clementine. every time I looked at the clock it was 12:12 or 2:12 or someone other derivative. i’m not hungry. i am vapid like a hole in space. 

to do: get toothpaste. 



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