we spent a lot of time in the dark screaming long before this night arrived. i’ve lived in dreams mostly, seeking oblivion. to find it like this, as sudden and furtive as promised. a side eyed stare and devout paranoia then a suffusing. a surrender.  a melting of my pulse into the spot between your shoulder blades. my scalp tingling as you peel my head away, hands deep in the fine auburn strands.

I can’t handle a long stare.

there is a spot no one knows about. it’s timing–not physical or found. metronomic. it starts with your hand around my throat. my body distant from her anxious shiver. .closer to death, the soft vein of you, your lust. the difference between my previous desire and this is the feel of soft finger asphyxiating. fulfillment. a want that is fed and no fear.

you take my breath away.

then the letting go.
the descent,
doll on your chest hair
and the long stare.

“The breath game”