they couldn’t take the
wanderlust,
the exhausting sadness,
all day naps,
three week periods, and
not even a fake smile but
always a goblet.
moonshine as promised.
I was a little
overgrown gerbil:

dependent, sitting in my cedar-scented
piss in a lounge chair in the backyard
picking pine needles out of my knots;
hollow but for some force fed
swallows,
rum-coated water,
stale lines and organic vegan pop-tarts.
a shriveling income and
hooked in my dejection;
my lifeline,
my blooming red moon.
centuries of howls and hands like
needles doping me
so I’m easier to ride,
and my braided tongue
lolling,
trying to unwind,
just licking up all the
shit
you fed to me.

with love,
you said.

“best wishes”

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